im freaking pissed.

im already fucking stressed up cus piano practical exam is next friday. and im seriously nowhere near a pass. teacher tested me just now and i failed terribly. so i stayed there for 2 and a 1/2 hours practicing the piano. then back home only at 9.30pm. and my fucking mum spoil my day as usual. fucker.

she never fails to spoil my day and make me go to bed angry. she came to telling me that she is going to book the korea trip tomorrow. its on the 21st december to 29th december. i said okie cus i have nothing on in that week. so i said before that week, i go japan with yuying concert band on the 15th december to 21st december then transit to korea to meet them there. and she dont allow. what the fuck. she said okie yesterday lah. she claimed that that is the only time left. fine. im free on that week what, but cant i go japan the week before? its not like is on the same week right? you are willing to change the date if others are busy, but not for me? some kind of fucking bias asshole. im not expecting you to postpone the trip, but i just want to go japan with the band. and you said that we will go there next time. fuck you. its a total different place that we will be going! the band is going there to watch a marching competition, masterclasses and going to those music areas. and if we were to go as a family, you will want to go sight seeing! dont you get it?! you think the competition and masterclasses are held whole year round? use your brain to think, not your butt. you never listen to my side of story. not everything tat you say is correct okie. you are just depriving me of what i want to do. im willing to work for the very first time to pay for my own trip and you also dont allow. what the fuck. im not a kid anymore. i can survive a transit to korea.
i want to go to malaysia with the rangers and you dont allow. i understand as its not a big group and quite dangerous cus all girls. fine. but im going to japan with a huge group of people! still got teachers to look after us and you also dont allow! im bound on going to japan. if you dont allow, i wont care. if not i wont go to korea either. take this option or leave it!
such a lier, so you cannot blame me if i lie too. its justa day since u agreed. bastard. i hate you to the core! asshole!
dont act as if you understand me well. the fact is that you dont at all. some kind of a mother you are.